Monday, February 28, 2011

Dopplers are a Girl's Best Friend

It's been fun being able to feel Mei-mei move.  It gives me reassurance that she's still alive, but it also makes me panic when I don't feel her for awhile.  This morning I was nervous but couldn't very well break out the doppler with my 5-year-old daughter clinging to me every second and demanding to be entertained.  So I endured the torture of waiting until 1:00 after I dropped her at kindergarten.  Heartbeat in the 160's.  I can function again - for now.  Thursday's appointment feels a long way off.

Q and I aren't the only ones in our family living in horrible suspense every single day.  Last night I talked to my sister-in-law, who is pregnant for the 11th time and has just one child to show for it.  I want so badly for their baby to make it.  After so much heartbreak, both of our little rainbow babies are needed, not just wanted.

I got some good news last week when I finally got my taxes done.  If I'd known the outcome would be so good this year I wouldn't have procrastinated so long.  We're getting nearly $7,000 back!!  This happy surprise is largely thanks to a deduction for medical expenses that exceed 7.5% of income.  Our medical expenses for 2010 were a shocking 43% of income!

I wish I'd kept better records of all the costs incurred over the 4+ years we've been dealing with loss and infertility.  Add up all the costs for the pregnancies, two hospital deliveries, two burials, lots of very expensive tests, a surgery that went badly, seven IUIs, two IVFs, and now a high-risk pregnancy and it's easily into six figures.  I estimate that we've spent about $30,000 out of pocket.  Thankfully we had great insurance that paid most of the costs other than the IVFs.  Yes, past tense on the great insurance.  Now we have United Hell Care  : (


4 comments:

Alex said...

That's one of the worst things about infertility and loss - if it didn't suck enough, now you have to pay gobs of money for it! But I'm very happy you're getting a sizable tax refund - that should help.

Jana said...

wow. that's a lot of money--both spent on infertilty, and thankfully what you will be getting back on taxes. have fun spending it if it isn't already spent

Chelsea said...

I'm so glad you're feeling her and getting to love that doppler! I hope you can tell the kids soon.You will feel a little better when you pass the 21 week mark. Let me know what Dr.Collins says about the cord pictures.
I'm thinking about you.
Cindy

CeCe said...

dopplers are great. well done with the tax refund!