Wednesday, January 27, 2010

More Rain and No Rainbow

Once again, I can't even get a pink line, much less a rainbow baby. A rainbow baby, for those who don't know, is a baby born after loss, bringing light and color after a dark and terrible storm.

In Greek mythology, the goddess of the rainbow is Iris. She used the rainbow to travel down to earth to deliver messages from the Gods and to transport women's souls to the underworld. This is the only kind of rainbow I have gotten. Since my first loss I've gotten pregnant twice more, but the hoped-for rainbow babies never arrived. Instead, Iris's rainbow transported me to hell. I've often wondered what message God is sending me on this rainbow. He takes my babies again and again, but offers no peace, no comfort, and no guidance in the aftermath. I don't know how to live with this kind of a rainbow.


Me said...

Oh Annie! I am so sorry!

Lilly's Mom (Desiree) said...

So sorry that all of this is so confusing. Just remember that God is in control, and he has a perfect plan for your life...even though you might know His plan. =( I know it's not very comforting, but it's the truth!
I believe he allowed Lilly to pass (I don't think that He "took" her, but allowed her to be with Him) so that my husband and i would be closer, and that our relationship with God would blossom.
God bless you.
=( I wish I had the words to say, but know...if it is in your life plan...written by God, you will have that rainbow baby!! May God bless you, and your family.

love and hugs,

Kristy said...

I don't know how I missed this. I'm so sorry to read that this cycle was a bust. We are in the same boat. *hugs*